Conceal Carry Couture

If a law permitting Kansans to carry concealed weapons passes the legislature and survives a veto, the couturiers of our fair state will need to busy themselves to provide clothing for the new gun-toting license holders. Winter garb will not require anything new, except perhaps sturdier inside coat pockets with quick access. A shoulder holster or belt clip holster will do fine beneath a parka or overcoat. Spring or Autumn will not be a problem in Kansas either, because both seasons are usually dreadfully short and daily temperature extremes permit light winter clothing to be worn on most days. But, Summer is another story.

A clothing design and manufacture challenge to provide suitable conceal-carry apparel will be presented by Summer. When the temperature is 95 degrees and the humidity is around 60%, wearing clothing that provides for concealment of a weapon becomes a comfort issue, and possibly a health issue. For both sexes, in the Summer heat, above the knee and below the belly-button bottoms and short-sleeve or sleeveless tops are the usual dress. Where to conceal the handgun is the design problem.

For Bermuda shorts, a quick-draw cargo pocket, a sewn on fabric holster, if you will, is the logical solution. For tops, a billowy material with side slits for shoulder holster access might be the answer, but see-through fabric is a no-no. A loose vest could be worn, unbuttoned and oversized, to allow for ventilation, with an inside concealment place for a pistol. I guess one could always wear a muu-muu or a caftan like an Arab, provided it had an opening to reach for heat. Obviously, the fanny pack accessory is a possibility to conceal one's piece, but wearing it on one's backside might cramp one's quick draw style. A sun hat or oversized ball cap could be converted into a pistol holder, if the gun bearer didn't mind the extra weight on his or her head.

An innovative approach may be to disguise firearms. One could carry a camera gun that fires from the zoom lens aperture, or a single shot fountain pen gun. A golf club or tennis racket could be transformed into a barreled, magazine holding weapon, as could a walking stick or umbrella.

If the suggested clothing or accessory solutions are disliked, I suppose the conceal-carry licensee could carry a purse or attache case. This will obviously cause the term, girly-men, to go away if one were tempted to apply it to some gun-toting dude. Although it might be an appropriate epithet to throw around at a purse-carrying guy, it might evoke an armed reprisal. Surely designers can come up with a manly looking handbag for concealing a gentlemen's pistol, as long as the pistol itself is not a huge, long-barreled blaster. My guess is that, with the restrictions on carrying concealed weapons into certain places, a lot of weapons will be stored in vehicles. Some type of vehicle storage will need to be developed. I am thinking about dashboard, under-the-seat or in-the-door gun safes with an electronic opener for quick access.

There are obviously a lot of possibilities to conceal weapons. The only problem with some of the clothing solutions is that the reason for wearing a particular type of garb will be painfully obvious, because the dress of everybody else will tell others that they couldn't possibly be bearing arms. Maybe it would be better if we had an open-carry law and just strap on a holster with a six-shooter like they did in the Old West. It would sure help the clothing budget. And since the weapon wouldn't be concealed there would be no need for a new state bureaucracy to issue licenses.